The conception of diseases as per homoeopathy is not the name of disease but the dysfunction of the excretion and secretion of ductless glands, before this the disorganisation the function of particular cell of particular gland and the main disorder of understanding and judgement.

This is one of many befuddling tweets from Dr. IJS Guleria, a homeopath. Usually science enthusiasts on Twitter pepper him with insults. I watch them get nowhere.

I despise homeopathy. But this time, I decided to ask him a question: “Can you point to those under a microscope?”

His reply:

Disease force is operating on dynamic plane and is a simple substance hence it is beyond the purview of the microscope.

Okaaay. So I decided to open my mind, and over several tweets, I transmogrified into a first class new age prophet:

Oh, yeah, that’s like chocolate is an octave of the sun. The quantum forces of cosmic tropes collide to accelerate the midichlorians into the realms of dark and light forces, and ‘chocolate’ is a metaphor for the balance achieved by infinitesmal crystalline polarisations.

This truth has been known through aeons, that matter is not really ‘matter’ and that mind is not really ‘mind’. Hence, mind over matter is a false conundrum, for the two are actually one, in the great multiverse of planar topology. Beyond matter and mind rests only purity.

For where truth and untruth blend into a universum of continuums, overriding astral values, ether and substance, no more divisions exist. Disease is nothing. Health is nothing. There is only the peace of the exploding and ever-expanding universe, with its rhythms that are life.

Homeopathy is but one small and humble expression of that total submission of humankind epistemological soup. Ontology becomes irrelevant, because concepts like germs or parasites are no longer separate from the whole, or seen as the enemy. Unity is all. And therein lies freedom.

That is why one who has seen the enlightenment beyond ontology can with confidence say that disease force is operating on dynamic plane and is a simple substance, hence it is beyond the purview of the microscope. Who can know on what plane it s at any time? That is the point.

The sage responded:

‏We are in the realm of impoderables and counter further problems which are beyond human analysis.

Ah! It was worth it after all.

Finally we have found a meeting of souls beyond the incarcerations of Twitter. The eternal brotherhood of Unitas Sans Logicum Ad Absurdum will see a new dawn in the wellbeing of all life-forms, not only those composed of organic compounds.